Here are some things to consider doing. Some items may not be applicable to you.
If you’re divorced and have a child:
- Avoid saying derogatory things about your ex-spouse in front of your child – it hurts the child to hear bad things about one of the two people he/she came from, and if you need legal help use a family law specialist.
- Don’t use your child as a weapon against your ex-spouse
- Ensure you provide discipline (don’t let up because of the divorce) – your child may need the security of discipline even more because of the insecurity of divorce
After your child returns from a visit with his/her other parent:
- Avoid asking too many questions about the other parent
- Try to spend some extra time with your child
When your ex-spouse has custody of your child:
- Try hard to remember special occasions, e.g., birthdays, holidays, school plays
- Reassure your child that he/she didn’t cause the divorce
If other parent has left:
- Reassure your child that you won’t leave him/her, that just because the other parent left doesn’t mean that you will leave
- Try to provide your child with good role models