Here are some things to consider doing. Some items may not be applicable to you.

If you’re divorced and have a child:

  • Avoid saying derogatory things about your ex-spouse in front of your child – it hurts the child to hear bad things about one of the two people he/she came from, and if you need legal help use a family law specialist.
  • Don’t use your child as a weapon against your ex-spouse
  • Ensure you provide discipline (don’t let up because of the divorce) – your child may need the security of discipline even more because of the insecurity of divorce

After your child returns from a visit with his/her other parent:

  • Avoid asking too many questions about the other parent
  • Try to spend some extra time with your child

When your ex-spouse has custody of your child:

  • Try hard to remember special occasions, e.g., birthdays, holidays, school plays


  • Reassure your child that he/she didn’t cause the divorce

If other parent has left:

  • Reassure your child that you won’t leave him/her, that just because the other parent left doesn’t mean that you will leave
  • Try to provide your child with good role models


Thanks for reading!